A whirlwind summary

First term at ANAM has nearly come to an end! How did it all go so quickly?

The summer was blissfully relaxing; I managed to get a real break. My family went for a holiday down south in Western Australia, driving almost 1500km in about five days. (When I reported my travels to Victorian friends, most of them drew a blank at "down south" because obviously "down south" from Melbourne is the ocean....) There were lots of trees, wineries, local tourist attractions, beaches, more trees, good walks and a variety of interesting backpackers (and other budget travellers). I managed to sleep well - a particularly fine achievement as my brother tends to be a noisy sleeper (read: snores, breathes deeply, which I cannot stand!) and I always uphold when we go on holidays that I will, for the first night, share a room with him as we did when we were much younger at home, and if I can't sleep, I will trade with dad and share with mum. However, this was not at all necessary; we must have done so much that I was so tired and slept so well! I also experienced pretty severe sunburn, which is an experience I never want to have again. Oh, the pain and the peeling.....how pink I was!

I returned to Melbourne at the end of January, again before Chinese New Year. Good thing I have cousins over here, and that my aunt and uncle decided to come also to spend a few weeks with their children and attend to business. I was able to stay with them for a week or so before I moved into my new house (!!!). Upon reflection, and in telling people about my move to the other side of the river, out of college, into a place by myself, I find myself extremely happy. I feel much more relaxed, at liberty to set my times as I need, experiement with cooking, not needing to deal with red-tape administration, play political games, nor be bothered by stupid and rude behaviours that are not acceptable in normal society. It feels real, what it's really like to be living a real life that is not surrrounded by the fun, though rather artificial, environment that the previous seven years have been. Over the last few years, I've tried to have a 'no regrets' attitude to things, and this is one of them. Even though I feel so much happier about my living situation (and also that it's a leisurely 15min walk to ANAM every day!), I don't regret living at college for so long, as it suited my needs at that time. But this is the next phase of life, something that one needs to do before they reach 25, which I am to hit in just under three weeks!

The first term of ANAM always seems like a bit of a blur. Last year it went so quickly as I adjusted to how it all worked, a very new and different way of approaching my music. This year, after a bit of a summer break lull, it has been a refresher of how ANAM works, what the rest of the year is shaping up to be and how my learning goals are geared towards deepening my musical education. I've had a few projects that have already extended me beyond my perceived capabilities and set a tone of great expectation for the rest of the year. This year I feel like I am doing lots of things that I've never ventured near before: Brahms and Scriabin and a few other things thrown in for good measure. It shall be a good challenge and steep learning curve! There is also a distinctly different vibe among the students from last year to this year; I think I cannot say it is better or worse, but just different. Different people bring different vibes and the combination of so many new students with different life experiences and expectations obviously contribute to the flavour of it all, so why argue with it? I'm just letting it wash over me, deciding what I can tolerate, emjoy and avoid.

One other major factor that has changed this year is that I'm currently in the process of searching for a new church to be a part of. Since moving to Melbourne, I have been a part of the same church congregation (almost seven years) which has seen much change, due to the highly transitional nature of the congregation and its demographic. Due to a number of factors, not least moving house to another part of town, I decided that it was time to go elsewhere. Honestly, in many ways it might have just been easier to stay, despite the commute. I was (still am, possibly?) extremely sad to leave - it has been such a defining part of my life, particularly of my life in this city. I grew so much, I made many friends who are some of the most mature, generous, influential and loving people I have met; I have so much to be thankful for. It might have been easier if I was needing to leave because of a significant relocation (like to another city or country!) but it is weird to still be in the same city and know that I am elsewhere too. But change, despite how much we dislike it or are uncomfortable with many aspects of it, is often good for us, and a good reminder that we are fleeting in the whole scheme of things of life anyway. So continues life, for better or worse, and the earth keeps on turnin'...

One thing I've been slowly figuring out over the last few years is my identity, and how we are inherently relational beings. Given the number of changes that have happened, particularly in the last few years (changing study/work, living, involvement in various things), I've discovered and constantly rediscover the relationships in my life that form, establish, fall away, re-establish, and continue to simmer and grow over time. While I often don't see change from day to day, little moment peaks and coincidences happen every so often that remind me that I am ultimately not in control of very much, and that we just have to ride the life journey for all its enjoyments, grief, and surprises.

This blog hasn't disappeared!

I have just gotten myself one of those USB modems so that I can finally have the internet on my laptop. I've just been lazy after moving house, and part of me really enjoyed not having the internet at home (apart from a bit on my phone). I read some, cooked well, relaxed, didn't spend entire evenings staring at a screen (as I have inadvertantly done tonight after setting it up), and my house has been quite clean.
But it was getting a bit inconvenient. So I signed up for the most basic amount. Just to keep myself in check, just to get by with the simple stuff, coz really, right now, it's about decluttering parts of my life. Making it streamlined, making it work, and getting on with the things that really matter to me.
So maybe the next few blog posts might unfortunately cover much material and time. Sorry about that.
The brief story is that I am back at ANAM this year; stuff has started very quickly and of course, there is not much time to take a breath now that the ball has started rolling (and is gathering great pace)! A few concerts have already been played, new material is being learnt and new, bigger goals are being set.
Bring it on.

2011: a reflection

Concerts attended: 55
Concerts played in: 42
Bach Preludes and Fugues read through this year so far: 47
Trips out of Melbourne for concerts: 4
 New friends made and experiences of ANAM 2011: priceless

What a year it's been. I never dreamt that this could happen, that I would be asked to audition and come to this institution. I never thought I'd get this amazing opportunity to study with the teacher I wanted to learn with. I never thought I'd have this much motivation to work so hard. I never thought I'd get through THIS much repertoire in one year (and let me tell you, the list is mighty long!). I didn't think that I could sustain that much playing without feeling some sort of physical pain. I never thought some of those people would be my friends, but ta-dah, look, they are! I never thought it'd come full circle in one year - chamber music finals, when it all started with chamber music camp 2010 and the competition a few months later.

But it did all happen. Somehow.

There have been so many highlights (with only a few blips on the radar) of the year. There have been some amazing artists, amazing teachers and people to inspire. There have been some extraordinary works to learn and perform. There have been so many revelations: technical, musical, personal. There have been wonderful colleagues who have encouraged, challenged and been so enjoyable and fun to work with.

It really is a unique place - I have heard so many guests come and say that they've never experienced any other institution quite like it. I'm pretty amazed that pianists are encouraged and even required to undertake lots of chamber music and sonata work with other musicians. I have discovered amazing musical collaborations with some of my colleagues this year and enjoyed getting to know them and their work very intensely in a short space of time. I still sometimes have to pinch myself to make sure this is reality, and that I'm well in it.

This is not to say it's always been easy. On the contrary. There have been times of craziness, where I wanted time to stand still, for it all to go away, to have a body double, as I wondered how I managed to get myself into so many things. Throw in the other stuff of having a part-time job, often-inconsiderate other residents and the stresses of normal life and it got a little bit out of hand. But all those around me were giving, generous, kind and encouraging.

And it's been busy, for sure. I had to make a list of dates with the repertoire for the second half of the year because I couldn't get my head around it, and couldn't figure out what to practice. My arms cradled a large pile of books  that I apparently got lost behind. Just when I thought the pile would decrease, another thing would be added to it. Too often, I think, I said that I'd catch up with friends "when this is all over" but it never seemed to be over until the very end. But I'm one of those people that would like to have no regrets, so I also don't regret working hard this year and getting to know a bunch of other people. This is the journey of life, yes, where we meet different people at different times along the adventure? I only not regret being able to have 400% of time and energy and effort to maintain every relationship to the same degree as I would have liked.

I've learnt how to say 'no' a bit better this year, but it's still a work in progress. I've been given amazing opportunities this year and I've grabbed most of them and run far and fast. Maybe I should have been pickier and choosier about the battles and challenges I wanted to take on - a precedent has now been set! I hope I have the same sort of drive and passion through and beyond next year. I hope I continue to see things as great opportunities, despite it being a bit different, the vibe and personnel changing. 2011 has been a defining year indeed, and one that I'm thankful for.

The back end

So my ANAM year has finished for 2011. I played my last concert for the year on Wednesday at the Hobart Town Hall, and tonight I will be going to the final concert at the MRC. I am feeling quite nostalgic about this group of students with whom I've travelled over the past eleven months, but there is so much other to report on, so let's get cracking on it...



Looking for houses
I decided over the last summer that this would be my last year at Queen's. I wasn't sure how I was going to manage what I knew (and probably didn't anticipate to the extent that it has been!) was going to be a busy year at ANAM and a job that required some weekly commitment and a fluctuating workload according to the season of things. Thus, we commenced our house hunt a number of months ago. K and I decided we would like to live together, and on some sort of chance-like conversation, we also found J and considered him a worthy housemate! First up, I knew from stories of others' experiences that house-hunting is not a particularly pleasant or enjoyable experience, but one that is necessary. I was prepared for that. I was not, however, prepared for what it actually involved. Such ignorance on my part! Where do people learn all these life skills if they're not formally taught or told what they have to do?! Thankfully the other two had their heads screwed on the right way around and were able to navigate the ins and outs of it all. However (to cut a very long story short), in our looking-arounds, J discovered that he had an increasing preference for north of the river, while I discovered an increasing preference for south of the river. My preferences are borne out of the fact that ANAM is in South Melbourne and that while this year has been great (for saving a small though significant amount of money, pursuing a job that looks great on my CV, being in close proximity to some friends, convenience factors, being able to be part of my church community locally), the travel through the city every day, which adds up to about an hour and a half all up, has been quite tiring and cumbersome. And I realise I'm crossing a great divide as I go southwards - it seems akin to crossing the river in Perth, which I will NEVER do..! (Now just watch me break that one..!) But it seems like the logical choice given that I spend most of my time at ANAM and travel time is something I would like to not have to factor in very much of. So over the course of looking online, going to a few inspections, applying for a house in Brunswick, we parted ways as other opportunities came up. I think we parted happily - we are all still friends (yay!) who are scattered a bit more than originally planned. Maybe it'll just mean that we can go to each other's places for dinner or something fun like that. So the big announcement is that I will be a resident in Albert Park next year. It is a studio apartment/granny flat thingy above the garage/workshop at the back of a house owned by a couple whose daughters have since moved out of home. It is a 10min walk from ANAM, in a really nice area (safe, nice people, close to all sorts of things) and I think it will work out well, at least for next year. The only thing that scares me a little is living by myself, but having talked to lots of people about it, the way I figure is that I spend so much time with other people (okay, bar the time alone in a practice room) and working in collaboration with them that the space by myself I think will be good to have - to recharge as an introvert. I am scared, and also looking forward to checking out the area, learning the new locality, finding new places to hang out and visit, going to a different market and the like.

And obviously associated with moving out of Queen's is the end of my job. I've had the role of Director of Music for two years and honestly, it looks pretty good on paper for a first job out of university. When I first took the role, people sounded impressed, but I honestly think that it has sounded better than it actually entails. Hopefully nothing I write will incriminate me here, but in (fairly) brief, I have found it difficult this year to run a concert series with what felt like little administrative help (from organising all the little details of each concert, to being on the door at concerts other than my own, where I had to call in favours from friends, to making sure that the room was clean and set up, often I would do the set-up myself). I've also found living at College this year quite difficult; I think I have found it quite difficult in previous years, but other factors have compelled me to stay. This year I was living facing inwards to the quadrangle, and endured quite a lot of noise - from the gym that would be in use and pumping out awful doof-doof for hours each night, to drunken shenanigans. Try to combine that with a rigorous schedule which would have hopefully seen me sleep between the hours of 11pm and 6.30pm in a regimented way (occasionally those times get skewed, in the direction of less sleep) and College works out to be a terrible place for such discipline. For the frustrations of running a concert series pretty much single-handedly, it has been quite a success, if I may say so myself. The Seraphim Trio concert drew a capacity crowd (with some help from the Development Office). The Beethoven concert I played with E was a great opportunity to play ANAM repertoire in a different setting, to prepare for other recitals, and to test what it'd feel like to play three big Beethoven sonatas back to back (hint: I didn't collapse but was very exhausted...)
Alas, the job is complete and I am hoping the girl that rang me and asked me questions for half an hour does get the job, and that I also have not misrepresented my experience - all the good, bad and ugly of it.



Schools concerts with Richard Gill
One of the annual projects at ANAM is community engagement. These are usually concerts presented to children at local primary schools. After Breath Week earlier in the year, where the ANAM choir was led by Richard Gill, I knew that I had to get myself into the project he was leading later in the year. I learned that if you ask and express interest with your own initiative, sometimes people are willing to consider you for things that they wouldn't have otherwise. So, I laneded myself in this particularly Community Engagement project. We had an introductory session where we talked about why it's important to teach music, what ways we can do it, and things like that. Just as a preface (which is obviously late..!), Richard Gill is a conductor and extraordinary music educator who has spend years tirelessly advocating for music education in schools. He is an inspiring man with so much energy and passion. We were to do two days (only in the morning) at Albert Park Primary School. There was some confusion about how it was all going to run (again cutting long story short) so it was decided that Richard would lead the sessions on the first day and we would see how we went and we could lead it on the second day. We had prepared some repertoire to introduce the children to music and to listening for certain things. Watching Richard interact with the children, and the questions that he asked and they way that he got them to listen and answer was incredible. One of his blanket rules is to demand that they listen, that the music demands their attention, and to expect that children will be intelligent and ask and answer questions the prove this. We did not feel as if we were going to do a job half as good as him the next day...! But we did get there. We probably weren't quite as enthusiastic, or quite as comfortable, but we still managed to do it. It was also pretty cool to see how the children reacted - to spot the ones who obviously had some musical training, the ones who were actively listening, the ones who moved to the music and things like that.


Then it started getting really busy (if it hadn't already been!). A few more projects were added to the pile: the Smalley horn trio (Australian Voices concert), chamber competition (two ensembles), Beethoven in Hobart. The Smalley horn trio is hard. Really cool, and really hard. We started work on it at least a month in advance because we knew it was going to be a challenge. The programme was curated by Ian Munro, the Australian pianist, who made two visits to ANAM in two weeks. I had a couple of lessons with him, which were great. So much to think about, so many ideas! He apologised that I had been allocated the trio, which is apparently far harder than the quintet he was playing. Oh well. I learned lots, worked my butt off for it, and it was an enjoyable experience. In the late projects of the year, I had been in groups that I had not really played with very much, or at all throughout the year. I found that lots of these were actually great collaborations, and am sad that we didn't discover these much earlier in the year to foster these musical relationships (and friendships to boot!). It's a bit of a pity as some of these people are leaving ANAM after this year! :(

My two ensembles somehow found ourselves in the Chamber Competition Final (of five ensembles); the final was about two weeks after the first round - uh-oh! We quickly have to learn the rest of the piece!!! Let me tell you, trying to put together a quartet and sextet with insanely busy people with other projects and classes and commitments is really difficult. The cellist in both of these groups was also the same guy, so as we tried to fit in as many rehearsals as possible to give us the winning edge, I found myself running from rehearsal to rehearsal, often spending five hours before lunch with the same person. Talk about intense! Also switching from composers and styles so quickly proves to be a challenging brain game as my role in each ensemble changes ever so slightly. However busy this period was, it was a very steep learning curve on how to keep on top of things, to manage a bundle of demanding programmes at one time, to be efficient at doing stuff. I wouldn't ask for the workload for more than three or so weeks though - it's physically and mentally draining. So many kind and well-meaning friends would express their concern at my workload only to be met with my reply of, "Well, it's gotta be done!". Sorry for anything that may have come across as rude or unappreciative. The actual Chamber Competition Final was an exciting night. Guaranteed to have a high standard of playing (this is the final, right?!) and to be an evening of great variety and great indecisiveness, I think this night is one of the hightlights of the whole year. Apart from the music and extensive preparation, there is the ever-present question of what we were going to wear. For a big night, we demanded big dresses....! D6 probably would have won an audience prize of best-dressed, as our clarinettist was playing with MSO earlier that night, where the dress code is tails and white tie. To make life much easier for him (not sure how?!), the male half of our sextet donned tails and white tie (they looked so dapper!) and the girls found extravagant dresses to match. In my case, this was the rare pulling-out of the year twelve ball dress, which doesn't fit quite as well, but makes a significant statement. We walked to out whistles and great laughter, as we played the cheesiest piece of 'serious music'. There were moments in the piece where I just felt we let go and let the music happen - it is such an incredible experience to be able to do this: to know your part so well, and to trust the other musicians so much. The talented quartet who played the Ligeti quartet won the competition, which was really exciting! I think something that has really struck me about ANAM this year is how supportive everybody is about everybody else; I feel that there hasn't been that streak of competitiveness that is associated with most high-level training, or even at universities and conservatoriums. There were certificates handed out to students who were finishing their time at ANAM, as well as a few more awards - the recipients were indeed worthy! A fine celebration at the pub followed an incredibly long day. What a relief for it to be over, but also a little sad, as I came to love the people I was playing with, enjoying spending such intense amounts of time with them, and working so decidedly towards something.

But, they say no rest for the wicked! The next morning, I was off to Hobart for another ANAM project. The Tasmanian Symphony Orchestra was having a Beethoven cycle, performing all of the symphonies across a period of a few weeks. As part of the festival, we (ANAM) were to present a total of four free lunchtime concerts of Beethoven's solo and chamber works. Each day featured one of the pianists and their associated artist/s. I was playing the second and the fourth concerts (one week apart - I flew down twice): Piano Sonata No. 17 in d minor 'Tempest' Op. 31 No. 2, the 7th violin sonata in c minor Op. 30 No. 2, the 5th cello sonata Op. 102 No. 2 and the 'Ghost' Trio Op. 70 No. 1 (heck, I hope all those opus numbers are correct!). Lots of Beethoven to round off my ANAM year - a tiny bit like how I opened it, and worked through it...
We were put up in the Old Woolstore Apartment Hotel, which is quite a nice hotel at one end of the CBD, and right across the road from the ABC/TSO studios. How handy! We were given a studio apartment EACH (Seriously, I'm a student. I sort of was expecting, and totally would have been fine, to share, but no!). I walked in to a large room and thought, "Is this all for ME?!?!" I was thankful to be staying for two nights! We wandered down to Salamanca for a quick lunch, then had a bit of rehearsal/practice time in the afternoon. We went again to Salamanca to Cargo's for dinner; it was a warm balmy night and so there were quite a few people out. Pizzas there are excellent, and there is much choice. We finished up with gelate in excellent delectable flavours. The next morning, I went to meet S for breakfast. She was in Hobart for the AISOI programme, which was cool, because we had actually (re-)met two years prior at the same programme when we were next-door neighbours at the student apartments. We struck up a friendship, played in a trio together the following year, and have since become great friends. It was lovely to see S again after a while. She is really good at keeping in touch, even though we don't see each other as regularly as we used to (maybe two times a week for rehearsals). I then wandered off after breakfast (and buying a delicious-looking lamington) to the Hobart Town Hall to have a brief rehearsal at the venue where I'd be performing the next day.

It is a lovely room, quite sizeable. The room is mostly light blue, with great decoration and detail. The stage is raked, which makes it quite trippy, considering that there is also a very lovely Steinway 9-foot piano on stage. I am one of those people that like things to be parallel and perpendicular and straight and this caused a bit of disconcern. However, it is a beautiful instrument to play. The Town Hall had also been filled with seating, about 300 or so chairs. When I first walked in, my immediate thought was, "We're never going to fill it! So many chairs!", probably based on the audience size that come to the lunchtime concerts at South Melbourne. However, when I arrived at about 12.45pm later to watch the first concert, the hall was already about half full, and taking a seat that I thought was going to be quite near the back (about three-quarters the way down), people kept streaming in. The first concert went really well, and it was delightful to hear such joyful Beethoven's music can be. A celebratory drink and lunch followed the concert before another rehearsal with K for our concert the next day. We went to Fish Frenzy that night for dinner, which was great - K and I had vowed to eat seafood while in Tasmania (because it is so good, and Tasmania is known to have great seafood and produce). The Fish Frenzy on the menu was a large portion of fish, calamari and scallops, accompanied by chips. What a feast! We rolled home after a good feed in preparation for our concert the next day. It went pretty well; the audience was bigger than the previous day (apparently the audience size kept growing. By the last concert, which I played in the following week, the hall was full and there were people sitting in the little seats down the sides in the bays.) However, all I could think while playing was, "Oh no, that's going on record!" The concerts were recorded by the ABC in Hobart and will be aired in the period between Christmas and New Year. I am hoping that they also recorded some of my rehearsal and can edit!! A celebratory lunch and drink again and then it was to the airport to fly back to Melbourne. A delay prolonged our trip home after a really long day, but it was nice to know that we would be coming back to Hobart within the week!

With only one concert left, I was pretty excited. There have been very few times this year where I have only had to work on one programme - usually my time must be divided between practicing my own repertoire, chamber repertoire, having rehearsals for several groups and having lessons and tutorials on various things. With only one cello sonata and trio to go, my workload was very well set out. The sonata I have played a bit this year, and it's nice to have played it now three times in the year, also having it be a re-visit from several years ago. The trio I also learnt last year, but obviously playing it with different people makes it a different experience. However, familiarity is always nice. My second visit to Hobart was again enjoyable, perhaps a little more so as my travelling companions were people I knew much better. The member of faculty was also excited about dining with us, and really enjoyed the experience of relaxing, eating and drinking and listening to music! Incidentally, also staying at the same hotel that week was the Australian test cricket team. I tried not to stare in two days as various assumably famous people wandered in and out! We grabbed lunch on the pier, at the old Jam Factory. We also finished up with ice-cream on the perfectly beautiful sunny day, and then headed off to rehearse. A productive rehearsal later (albeit with some weird balance issues because the studio we were in was not ideal, nor did it replicate the hall in any way) we went back to the hotel to rest and do whatever. I watched TV for about two hours. Amazing.
We then wandered down to Salamanca to eat dinner at a lovely Italian restaurant which was very busy, but totally worth the wait. H ordered drinks and entrees, which is always a wise idea because he knows his food and drink. Excellent choices! The majority of our table enjoyed the spaghetti marinara, with excellent seafood (this is half the reason to go to Hobart - to enjoy the food!!). A fine evening to remember.

Our concert the next day went well. As I mentioned before, the hall was packed. A couple of friends unfortunately couldn't make it, but others did, so it was lovely to see some familiar faces in te very large audience. We played quite well, even though again, some part of my brain was focussed on the fact that ABC was recording our concert. Lunch and drinks at Fish Frenzy (again) by the pier - champagne at 3 o'clock in the afternoon - to mark our final ANAM performance for 2011 was a perfect celebration. Such relief at the end of a busy year called for extreme happiness for the rest of the day (spotted with tiredness!) and a well-earned sleep in the next day. What an adventure.

To follow in the next post: final musings and reflections on the year....

I take it all back - part A

You know that thing I said in my last long post about the second half of the year being disproportionate in terms of performances? I take it back. I should know better than to think I would be not so busy. I was talking to an old friend today and she asked how everything was, and I replied, "Oh you know, busy as ever." To which she responded in mock shock, "Gladys? Busy?! Never!! What have you done with yourself?!" So yes, I should know better. Me, of all people, should have expected this!

So this post will recount several exciting adventures since 10 October:

The Recital
The recital. The big event (or not?) of the ANAM year for each student. Each student is required to present a 50min (or so) public recital which makes up part of the ongoing measure of progress. We have free reign over the programme - it is completely free choice. At university, one usually tries to pick a programme that best demonstrates capacity to cross a range of styles and technical demands. While that is nice and all, we are at liberty to pick a programme here that may have thematic links, may include ensemble pieces, and/or just be stuff that we'd like to play. Such freedom! (With great freedom comes great difficulty in decision-making.) The recital is presented to the public (so it means the usual enthusiastic crowd, and as many friends and family you can muster together) and there is a panel consisting of your teacher (or other instrument specialist) and another who sits on all the recitals for this year (this year it is the flute teacher). We don't receive grades or numbers as such, but we do get comments, and a indication along a scale from Not Satisfactory - Exceptional. It is nice in many ways to not have any grades, as we are not studying for any degrees or qualifications, but instead are setting particular goals about artistic achievements and are refining our craft by doing and getting practice at doing. So even though I had this amazing breadth of choice about what I wanted to play, I somehow ended up with a full 50min recital of solo repertoire. Don't ask me how it happened - it just kinda did and look, I found myself with no ensembles in my recital! I suppose that meant that I could prepare at exactly my own pace. The programme was as such:
Bach: Four Duets BWV 802-805
Beethoven: Piano Sonata No. 17 in d minor Op. 31 No. 2 'Tempest'  
Rachmaninoff: Variations on a Theme of Corelli
I only realised much later after I had decided on my programme that the key structure was quite extraordinary and the progression of pieces was really organic. The four duets progress as such: e minor, F Major, G Major, a minor. The Beethoven is in d minor, but opens with an A Major chord in 1st inversion. The piece ends quietly with a d minor arpeggio downwards. The Rachmaninoff opens with the La Folia theme in a plaintive way in d minor.
It was extraordinary and totally unplanned!
I had done several runs of my programme for various very kind and willing friends. However much one prepares for things like this, I think I am still at that point where there are still some things that you can never anticipate, or plan for, or that you will react in very different ways than anticipated, or that you might never feel 100% ready. My mum had flown in that weekend just to see my recital (and okay, I suppose, hang out a bit with me, which we did) and several friends had told me that they would be coming to my recital. I supposed that I had better practice if all these people were coming to see me play!
One of the biggest things I had anticipated but didn't realise the extent was just how exhausting it would be to play an hour's worth of recital. I knew it was tiring - it is a big programme and it is all very intense music requiring much concentration, particularly if some of it was from memory! Adrenalin obviously kicks in, but one usually can't practice the adrenalin, only ever anticipate the theoretical effects or remember the experience of what it feels like. Through the recital, there were times where it felt like I could conquer the world (okay, not really. Maybe just the music and the hall) - what energy! And that people were sitting anticipatedly in silence to hear ME play....crazy!! Straight afterwards, as I was pushed out onto the stage to take a couple more bows, and through the lovely big hugs from friends, I found it difficult to stand upright on my two feet, let alone smile, due to utter exhaustion. So much adrenalin pumping through...!
Upon receiving my feedback, the comments were fair and very complimentary. I took the rest of that day off (rebellious!! The rest of the afternoon AND the night!!! AND I only went in for 10am the next day..!!!) and enjoyed hanging out with mum, a family friend, and some cousins.

So all sarcasm about taking a 'holiday' straight after my recital aside, there was actually still much to prepare for. I was playing in a friend's recital two days after mine - Beethoven's first violin sonata. This is a piece we had worked together on earlier in the year, and thankfully I had played it about a month before the recital (albeit with a different violinist). It was lovely to re-visit a piece we had worked on a while ago, when we were both still pretty fresh. It was so obvious that we had grown so much in five months. Also it is a piece that I only started studying this year, so it technically bears only ideas from this year, which I felt have changed greatly (in a positive way, to do with technique, ways of thinking about music) in the course of studying at the Academy.

Port Fairy & Team Awesome (PFE)
The other project soon after my recital was the Port Fairy Spring Music Festival. Directed by Anna Goldsworthy, this Festival has been running for just over twenty years (Anna not directing all of those..!). This year, a quintet of us from ANAM were invited to be part of the festival. Our quintet was a dymanic bunch of people, including our esteemed Artistic Director, Paul Dean, who is a lot of fun to play in an ensemble with, and excellent fun on a roadtrip, as I discovered. We were to play two concerts on the one day: Stuart Greenbaum's 'All the Ways of Leaving', which is incidental music to a Nick Earls short story (which was narrated by Michael Moore at Port Fairy), and a concert later in the day entitled 'Converging Spheres' featuring a work by Paul Dean of the same title, another of his pieces 'Abyss' for the quintet and violin, as well as the Beethoven Quintet for Piano and Winds in E Flat Major Op. 16 (a mainstay of my repertoire now!). We also played in a Saturday late night caberet show of fun acts. We had a powerful hire car in the oh-so-sexy black and took off on our way towards Geelong. I had never been very far west of Melbourne down the coast, no further than Geelong in fact. It was a great car ride, with the tunes pumping loudly, a bucketload of snacks (we prepared well) and good laughs to be had on the way. I was in the passenger seat, which of course means various duties: ensuring the driver has enough fuel (food-wise), holding things, reading signs, reading the map and directing once we got into town, experimenting with the music choice, among other things.

The journey took just over four hours, including the lunch break in Camperdown. It really is very different scenery on that journey. I often don't think of Australia having breath-taking scenery, apart from great beaches and desert, but one remembers that Australia is a land of great natural beauty of some much variety, even in Victoria. As we neared Warnambool, one can look out and see ocean!! This was particularly exciting as it reminded me a lot of home - we live near the beach (although we rarely go!) and it's a bit like driving down the coast. It is so beautiful, but I had always taken it for granted. I moved to Melbourne and don't really see any great beaches around. I have been to a few beaches out the other way of Melbourne but this was a bit exciting! As we rolled in to Port Fairy, I definitely got the small town vibe. It was wonderful! Crossing over the river and looking back, it looks a bit like what (apparently) Boston looks a bit like (I've never been, but I can imagine it!). The river, with many boats tied up, and houses right on the river - many older style buildings, some obviously renovated with floor to ceiling glass windows to drink in the magnificent view. Our accommodation was in self-catered apartments a mere three minute walk from the beach. They were comfortably furnished and a nice home-away-from-home for the weekend. One thing I love about going on such trips is that the sheets are always (okay, mostly!) white and crisp, and tucked in very tightly. Something I do NOT do! We had a rehearsal at the Drill Hall in town, which is attached to a restaurant/bar now - a magnificent piece of architecture that links the old and new with clever use of glass. Kawai was a sponsor of the festival, so all the pianos were fairly new and really very nice to play on - the Shigeru Kawais, which are their top range, I think. We then had the rest of the afternoon off to do whatever we liked. So we retired back to our apartments, and then went to the oval just down the road, which is actually the home of the Port Fairy Seagulls, the local football club. We had a kick of the football and threw the frisbee around. By 'we' I am loosely suggesting that I partook in such physical activity; in reality, my involvement was admittedly quite minimal given that I am fairly uncoordinated at any sporting activity. We then went for a wander to the beach (!!!) and then into town: we ambled along the river, crossing the bridge and walking along the pier. We spotted some funny looking birds, and admired the boats, some bearing funny names, some obviously recreational, to the last, which appeared to be a sizeable fishing vessel. We wandered along the streets of Port Fairy; I admired the quaint architecture of many buildlings along Norfolk Pine-lined streets. There is much charm about the town.

The artists of the festival were invited to drop in for dinners (early to late!) at a house that the festival rents every year to provide hospitality. We decided after our non-extrenuous walk, we would go for a home-cooked feed. We were met by a few musicians/culinary experts, and their friends, also chefs extraordinaire (as we were to find out!). We were greeted with such a warm welcome and were fed extremely well and richly. One of the people who were helping to cater for hungry tummies over the weekend was my former piano teacher, who had also brought her two children along. It was fantastic to meet them, as her eldest (daughter) was born while I was learning with her, and her son was born just after I stopped learned with her. I had actually seen part of their growth, which was a beautiful to see in front of me! Over two nights I managed to hang out a bit with them, watching some of their movie, and getting to know them a bit. By the second night, her daughter felt well and truly comfortable to crawl into my lap and stayed cuddled as we watched the movie. How beautiful children are! We headed home on foot (which was up the road) and I remembered that the city is full of light pollution - it really was very dark along this street!

The next morning was an early start with a rehearsal at 8.45am in our venue. The rehearsal only could go for about an hour because there was another concert at 10am in the same venue. Such is the schedule of festival: there are often so many concerts happening simultaneously, and many are back to back as well. We went to another venue for a 10am performance of Paul's piece, then immediately jumped across to another venue (where Paul was supposed to also be having a 'concert conversation' at the same time!). We were left to our devices for about forty minutes, where we wandered about town a little bit, including a foray into the lolly shop. This actually was child in a lolly shop - amazing! One of those old school stores where there were all sorts of wonderful boiled lollies, sour lollies, chocolates of all imaginations, sherbert delights, flavours of all sorts! It was quite difficult to not spend all our money there, and we walked out with big grins on our faces and decidedly excited about consuming said treats.Our concerts went really well, although it seemed to be a long day, with a rehearsal squished in-between our two concerts! We managed to fit in lunch at a fantastic cafe (Rebecca's. It is good. Seriously good. Go there.) and bumped into many audience members at this time, and later in the afternoon. Some of them even stopped us on the street. Most of them wanted to tell us how much they enjoyed our concerts. It was pretty funny feeling like a minor celebrity, even though we were such small names (or more like, no names!) in the whole scheme of the artist line-up. Apparently one audience member declared the second concert we did to be the best concert of the whole festival! Quite a declaration given the line up of the festival! After our concerts, we were able to scoff our faces with our fine purchases from the lolly shop, and to wander about town a little more. It was definitely a day for ice-cream, so we went to a fine ice-creamery and enjoyed even more culinary delights.

So I seem to have made out that all we did in Port Fairy was play some music, eat LOTS of food (most of it extremely fine. Actually all of it, bar the roadtrip snacks) and wander around, enjoying fresh air, the slower pace of a small town, not having to do other stuff and to enjoy hanging out and a weekend away. I certainly expected those things, and am glad to report that my expectations were met. We had another rehearsal in the evening (after a cheeky drink at the bar) for the evening caberet-style concert that was to happen at about 10pm that night. This show was hosted by Tim Ferguson (whom I admit we did a search for on Google to find out about him...!) who turned out to be a funny, quick-witted man. It was a very entertaining show for all involved. A late night at the bar with old and new friend ensued, and was enjoyed, particularly with the prospect of a lazy Sunday for us (not so for PD who had a rehearsal and then a concert of Messien's Quartet for the End of Time!). We slept in - I was under strict orders that I could not get out of bed before 9am (even if I was awake before then); this was not so hard to manage, though a little part of me really wanted to get out of bed! A quick pack-up preceded a walk into town where we had decided to return to Rebecca's to enjoy a big cooked breakfast. So, country servings....are LARGE! A wonderfully slow relaxed morning of great food and fun friends was followed by some more wandering. I had seen a sign for a school fete, and suggested we go. On our way, we stopped by a fun store where a guy was selling kites, and other fun games like the diablo, juggling balls, those mind trick games and other fun stuff. We stood for a while outside his shop playing with things and learning how to make them work and figure them out. We continued along to the school to check out the fete (what else did we have to do?) and wandered around. The boys 'played' guinea pig racing (this is the most obscure and random thing I have seen in a while!), we observed fun fair things like a massive blow-up slide, the hot dog (and other hot fried foods) stand that we felt ill about smelling after our deliciously large breakfasts, the various tidbits for sale, gift hampers, and a large selection of cakes and other delectable looking baked goods, and the jams and things people had made (yes, country school fete feel. Amazing!). Some beautiful dogs lined a footpath on our walk back into town (all 10mins of it..!) and we headed off to the Cafe des Artistes for one last feed before we embarked on our roadtrip home.

As the carload found out that I had never been past Geelong on the western side, and therefore never been along the Great Ocean Road, we decided that our roadtrip home would go via part of this scenic route. I had asked our accommodation owners for a suggested route that might add only a couple of hours on to our journey. He suggested that we take the turnoff from Warnambool and join the G.O.R. from there, where we would pass several look out points, including London Bridge (scene of accident several years ago where erosion finally proved its point and some people were left stranded on this outcrop), and the Twelve Apostles (of which there are only four left). It was a fantastic day for driving - sunny, a little bit windy, just beautiful. But windy at the coast means a pretty wild gust; I felt like I was going to be blown away with all the other tourists! We took our obligatory tourist shots (of course!), and marvelled at the scenery, commenting on how scary it would have been to be one of those people stranded at London Bridge, and admiring nature. Our car ride home was entertaining, quite ludicrous and sugar-filled. Coming back into the city, I felt somewhat anxious about having to go back to the real world of deadlines and the fast pace of life. What a great weekend of music-making with such fun people and fun memories!

It's been a bit busy..

Today I sent off two invoices, played for a friend's audition, ran into a friend on the tram, made it to a trio rehearsal, had another rehearsal straight after, went to class, did a photo shoot and jumped around lots, ate 1.5 doughnuts, stood around for 30mins, had a 1.5hr piano lesson, practiced for 1.5hrs, ran into another friend on the tram trip home and ate College Christmas dinner. Somebody didn't warn me that life was going to be a bit difficult sometimes!

 

So much has happened since the last post, but such stories shall have to wait for a while. Sorry readers, the day described above is admittedly extreme and quite unusual, but the average week has had days that are about half that, which is still a lot. I'll get there. Highlights to come include:

the recital experience

Port Fairy and Team Awesome (including the roadtrip)

looking for houses

the wrap up of my job (almost)

schools concerts with Richard Gill

A strange week

Last week was one of the strangest in a while. A week full of highs and lows.
Term 3 finally came to a close. On the long list of concerts for the rest of the year created during the middle of July, the list numbered about twenty concerts in the  next five months. Yes, that is an average of one a week. By the end of term three, about fifteen of them had been done. Disproportionate much?! It's been a busy few months, though mostly very good. And don't worry, I've managed to keep well out of trouble too!

The start of the holidays was marked by weddings. A couple of friends got married (separate weddings..), one at which I played at. I was a little nervous about this one, as it was only a three-piece band who hadn't played together on those instruments in a long time. But it all came together, which was wonderful. Another friend got married that morning elsewhere, but obviously attendance at one precluded me from attending the other. Facebook also told me that a couple of other friends also got married that weekend! Must have been a particularly great weekend to get married.

The Breakfast Club convened on Sunday morning at Chez Dre in South Melbourne, a new favourite place of mine. The Breakfast Club was formed at the beginning of this year over a conversation about how a friend and I love eating breakfast food and our decision to catch up and eat breakfast together. We meet probably about once every six to eight weeks. Most of us see each other at least intermittently, if not more regularly, but it is nice to have time to just sit and enjoy eating and catching up.

The start of the ANAM holidays signalled two weeks of hard work for me - a recital on the first day back was looming! A public masterclass with Angela Hewitt kicked off the holidays. It was held at Melbourne Uni, in Melba Hall, and heck, walking in there was pretty strange. Playing in there was even stranger! It was wierd after spending five years in there, being ready to leave, and then having to go back to something so familiar, and something to foreign, all at the same time! I played the Bach Four Duets for her, a piece I've been working on all year. And don't say Bach is easy. It's probably the most difficult thing to play! One is so exposed, and there are so many intricacies. Even those appear to be easy on the page, each piece being three pages long and 'only' two voices, the harmonies are complex - chromatic, and at times, dissonant. They are similar on concept to the Two-Part Inventions, but much more complex. If one takes a wrong turn, they might end up cutting out half of the piece, or going back to the beginning, making the whole process very arduous! These are pieces that one sits with for a long time, to process everything, to find different ways to do things, to come back to how one originally played them, with a whole journey behind them. Angela Hewitt had great feedback, lots of ideas and demonstrated how she plays the pieces; it was so obvious that she has such an affinity and love for Bach. What was more interesting for me, however, was that many of her ideas were very different, opposite in fact, to Nikolai Demidenko's ideas. Interesting. What to do?! I'm one of those people will absorb all the ideas and suggestions like a sponge, and then process them all, and figure out which ones I will take, which ones I discard. In the end, I had to decide how I wanted to play them, right? It's no use sounding like a mashed-up combination of many very different ideas and not to sound like me, is it?

The following night, I unfortunately missed Stephen Hough's concert (as well as Saturday night, which was a real pity - I was planning to go, but another opportunity presented itself. More about that later.). I won some tickets to see a screening of The National Theatre's "One Man, Two Guvnors". If you get the chance to see it (though limited screenings), you definitely should. It's based on the play 'Servant of Two Masters' (I think, or something that sounds very similar to that). Think British comedy with some over-the-top stereotypes. Fabulous acting, fantastic physical comedy and some really cool interaction with the audience too! It was an utterly hilarious evening with some great company.

On Wednesday night I went to see Matthias Goerne (baritone) and Eric Schneider (piano) perform Schubert's Die Winterreise. It was probably one of the most moving concerts I've been to. It was absolutely incredible. From both performers were so many extraordinary colours, such moving music. Truly extraodinary. It was also a highly appropriate day for it, as outside the weather had turned very wintery. In preparation for recitals, a couple of us piano students stayed late to practice the following night. During the week, the Melbourne International Festival of Brass had commandeered ANAM and there were very many concerts going on. That night was a concert presented by the Australian Brass Quintet, and our teacher was to be playing Gershwin's Rhapsody in Blue in a new arrangement for piano and brass quintet. We watched that little bit and watched our teacher totally nail his part, though at times it was a struggle to hear him above the brass resounding for a very long time in the bathroom that is the Hall!

On Friday I had coffee with a school friend that I really haven't seen in almost seven years! She has just moved to Melbourne. It was great to catch up after all this time, reminisce a little, and see what was going on. I've said it several times, but it struck me again, that school was really good - we had plenty of opportunities but now is a different stage in life where things are different. I really enjoyed school while it lasted, and I was sad to leave, but growing up means things change for the better and worse. It is an interesting thought, is it not?

I managed to avoid the city for most of the Saturday, which was Grand Final Day. I have friends who are hardcore supporters of both teams that were in the final - I knew I was going to have friends who were ecstatic and devastated whatever the result. The evening, however, was a most exciting event - an Orchestra Victoria fundraiser dinner. Dame Elisabeth Murdoch actually had bought a few tables, and donated one of them to ANAM. Nine students and the Artistic Director were invited to attend this black-tie event. All a bit exciting. It was held at the Myer Mural Hall, which is on the top floor of the Myer building in the city; it's a swish venue, Art Deco style and usually not open for public access. Champagne and canapes greeted us upon entering. We swooned at the extravagance of the venue and I giggled with glee at how exciting the whole idea of me getting to go this sort of function was. I will admit that I may never get to go to something liek this ever again. Stephen Hough would unfortunately have to wait until his next tour. It was an extravagant affair. The Orchestra played a few numbers, there were gift bags at the tables for the women (some moisturising cream, a new product being launched at Myer), golf leaf on my dessert, Placido Domingo and Katherine Jenkins at dinner (unfortunately they didn't sing), David Hobson as the MC (we had a photo with him, to prove it), many who's-who in Melbourne in attendance. I feel like I should have been provided with a document in advance with photos and a little write-up about each person's claim to fame or what not. Like diplomat's aides have. It was a very enjoyable evening, free flowing drinks and great food, all with fabulous company. How funny.


Those were the highlights of the week. Quite extraodinary, let me point out. I don't usually lead such an extravagantly glamourous and exciting life. The lowlights were being hit over the head with sad news of tragic deaths of two young men - one I didn't know, the other I knew vaguely. Both were surprising, both were unexpected. Given that there had been quite a bit in the news about young children dying in tragic accidents, it was a pretty rough week of news. And one doesn't really ever expect that somebody they know is going to be around one day, the next day not. I suppose it gives us reason to be thankful for everything that we have every day, and to live life to its fullest and to have no regrets. As a friend once pointed out that it sucks for the people who are left behind. Yeah it does, but I suppose this faith is also one of great comfort and assuarance.